over a month

well it has been well over a month since i have written anything on here about my heart. .. . i guess the main reason is that i have just been thinking about it less and less and am so much more focused on just living. . controlling the things i can control and not worrying about the rest.

feeling powerful

i am the sum of my experiences

open heart surgery

this wasnt my surg. .. ..

ad campaigns

so there is this huge uproar in the medical community . .. ..

you can read more about them
here
and here
and here
and here

and i cant say that i blame them. . i am coming at this from a different angle though. as a patient and an owner of a cardiac rhythm device. . i wonder if this is really the best use of their resources. i mean i am currently having a hell of a time getting reimbursed for expenses from a recalled device. . yet somehow they can afford this. . they are calling it an awareness campaign. .. but its a for profit awareness campaign. ..

so medtronic is countering with this

i currently have an aortic root and valve made by medtronic. . and as best i can tell it is serving me very well. . but are they going to start advertising them next. .. well you may have an abdominal aortic aneurysm. .. you should ask your doctor about the $55,000 medtronic freestyle aortic root. .. .. you just might save your life. .. perhaps i am rambling a bit. . i just dont get some people. . this is such a transparent attempt to sell icd's

artificial heart

so i was reading dr wes this morning. .. and he has a great link to a national geographic page. .. pretty cool video

why everyone should support stem cell research

obviously i am not a doctor or a researcher. . but i came across this article recently which talks about how stem cell research has created beating heart tissue in the lab. .. i guess i have a hard time understanding how anyone could oppose using embryos for research that would otherwise be discarded or frozen forever. .. .i can understand not wanting to make new embryos for this purpose. . but i have designed multiple fertility clinics in my day and i know the amount of energy and time it takes to preserve a frozen embryo. .. ok so i am getting off the subject a bit. .. back to the beating heart tissue that will one day save someones life who is reading this. . maybe my own. .. i can understand the ethical issues. . . .they are very similar to ones crossed many times before in the field of science and medicine. .. this argument is not about the right to life movement and bashing them. .do i disagree with the basis of their general arguments. .. yes. .. do i think it has any place in science. .no

so this was fairly hastily written. . ill clean it up later on

pacemaker check up

so today i have a pacemaker check-up. .. and its been exactly 9 months since i had it implanted. .. none months ago seems like years ago to me now. ..to think about the things i couldnt do or was afraid to do back then. .. its amazing to me how quickly the body really heals. . i used to think this was taking forever and i would never really return to my old self. . while there are definitly things that i have and i am still working on changing. .. i feel like such a better person. nine months ago i could barely walk down the street to buy some ice cream. . last night i walked four miles. .. and i couldnt do any of that without my pacemaker. .i used to hate having it. . and i still do somedays. .. but its really become a part of me and many days i forget that i even have it. .. until its a cold day like today and i can feel it just under my left clavicle. .... so today i will go to my checkup like i always do and get a new printout of settings for my wallet. . and have my scar looked at. .. and everything will be fine. .. its really does amaze me how routine all this has become. .. that saying. ."if it doesnt kill you it makes you stronger" really does mean something. so if the next nine months are as great as the last few have been . . i cant wait. . .